Your mental health

Acknowledging your feelings

• You need to give yourself permission to feel everything. It is normal to go through so many emotions and to go back and forth with what you are feeling. Everything you feel is completely valid.

• It is ok to take time for yourself alone to sit and process your feelings.

• Sometimes speaking about your baby can help you process what has happened and how you feel. You can talk to anyone you want about this; it could be someone you trust, like your parents, a trusted teacher, your closest friends, etc.

• If you find talking too difficult or not something you want to share with others, then you can get creative with it and do something like journaling, scrapbooking, painting/drawing or writing letters. You can always look back on these and can decide whether to keep them to yourself or share them with others.

Finding ways to remember your baby

Creating physical or symbolic mementoes to remember your baby can sometimes help you find comfort. Please look at the Remembering your baby page for more information on what you can do to remember your baby.

Communicating with others

It is important to still maintain relationships with others and not to isolate yourself. 

• In school, you should still try your best to engage in conversations with friends and classmates. This does not need to be 100% all the time. Just try to be present when you can in conversations. This can sometimes help as a distraction, but it can also help you feel supported as you still have people around you.

• Speak with someone about your feelings if possible; this could be a friend, parent, trusted teacher, etc. Let yourself process these feelings, and it is good if someone can be there to listen to you and help support you with them.

• Set boundaries for yourself. If there are certain things which might trigger your negative feelings, then it is ok to step away or put some distance for yourself. You don't need to attend social gatherings, which might make you feel worse; it is ok to protect your peace.

Accessing Professional and Peer support

• Therapist/Grief counsellors can provide safe, non-judgemental spaces for you to process what has happened and figure out what to do going forward.

• Your GP/local healthcare provider can refer you to NHS or local counselling services. They can also check in on you about your physical and mental well-being.

• Some charities provide peer support groups on social media platforms such as Facebook and WhatsApp. They may also provide 1-to-1 counselling.

Specialist Charities

• Tommy's - Provides a free confidential phone line for emotional support and mental health guidance for pregnancy loss. Also have Facebook support groups. Also has an online support programme.

• Sands - Provides support for all types of baby loss and has a free confidential phone line for emotional and mental health support.

• Miscarriage UK - Has a counsellors directory where you can find a counsellor who provides specialist support for you.

• Making Miracles - Provides face-to-face and online counselling for birth trauma and baby loss without any waiting list or age criteria. 

• Child Bereavement UK - Provides dedicated support for teenagers and young adults dealing with the loss of a child

• Muslim Bereavement Support Service - Provides free and confidential support to Islamic women who have lost a baby

Please go to our Helplines page for more information on how to contact these charities.

(Sands, 2013; Making Miracles, 2018; Child Bereavement UK, 2019a; Miscarriage UK, 2026; Muslim Bereavement Support Service, 2026; Tommy's, 2026)